Coming out letter

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  • Coming out letter

    What would be the best way to give the coming out letter to your parents?
    Yes, you decided that you write a letter for the coming out instead of verbal admittance to them.

  • #2
    I think that it would be best to provide the coming out in verbal form rather than in writing form. By telling them directly, you would be able to explain more. It would also be heartfelt with matching crying while explaining. Lol.


    • StrangeCup
      StrangeCup commented
      My hand will hurt if I'd had to explain everything to them by writing a letter explaining them my coming out confession. I agree that it would be more heartfelt if it were expressed verbally right in front of them. Yes, it is more sincere and they will accept me easily if that's the case.

    • Creamal
      Creamal commented
      GarnettThinBelieve but do you think that after all that coming out drama that you've had things would go back to the way it was? I don't think so. Things might come out differently.

  • #3
    If I'd leave them a letter then it is expected that they will never see me again since they cannot accept the real me. Everything that I wanted to say is already written in the letter then there is no need for me to be in contact with them because I know that they're badly hurt already and I don't want to end up hurting myself even more. I think I would just leave it at the mailbox.


    • macytrey
      macytrey commented
      I think that your parents would feel bad that you cannot express this to them in person but I think it is a much safer way to avoid too much conflict or heartbreaks. But if they could've accepted you in the first place then there is no need for you to be sending them your coming out letter like that.

    • FunThin
      FunThin commented
      It's best to write a letter for them to read it and feel it even if you're not present there. IT would make them think that you are sincerely writing this to them because you wouldn't bear saying this in front of them with all the tensions building up.

  • #4
    I would give it to them when I've gathered up all my courage to finally come out to them, but expressing it all through a written letter because it would be so hard for me to tell all of this to them, they will not let me explain my side unless I could leave them this and they will read it entirely with or without the need of my presence. I will just leave it on our front door and walk away.


    • LikeCream
      LikeCream commented
      Sometimes people are more expressing when they write things down instead of saying it. It is hard to be expressive through spoken words because sometimes you cannot take back what you have said, so, I suggest that writing is a better outlet to express your true feelings.

  • #5
    Writing them a long-ass letter would be tiring for me to do, can I at least just dial them up and talk to them on the phone? Hearing their voices would make me want to confess everything as long as I won't be doing this in frontof them which is why I'd prefer calling them instead of writing a letter.


    • daisyhoney
      daisyhoney commented
      Writing would be tiring and too old-fashioned to do, you should consider the phonecall because even typing the words that you wanted to say would be tiring to do as well. Be straight to the point and make your voice clear so you won't have to keep repeating yourself for them.

    • LegsGo
      LegsGo commented
      For me, I think writing is just too much. Or maybe they should figure it out that even through my simplest acts, can't they tell that I am slowly putting my true self out there?

  • #6
    I'll keep the letter short and simple. As in direct to the point where I would have to admit to them that I love them but they have to love the REAL ME, and that is where I'm going to explain why I am coming out to them like that. I will mail it to the post office to send it at home.


    • assWrytight
      assWrytight commented
      If they truly love you, of course, they would have to accept you because love is the only thing that shouldn't change. You know, if your parent truly love you that will never EVER change.

    • anyaneeze
      anyaneeze commented
      Sooner or later, you're gonna have to go to your parents and explain everything that you have said in that letter because they might somehow appreciate it better if you'd tell it to them face to face.

  • #7
    What is the point of coming out if you're just going to write it in a letter? Sorry, it's like writing a long message then you would easily press send and be waiting for a response for a day or two, perhaps? Why can't you just tell it to them since you've made up your mind about coming out to your family?


    • Siumedia
      Siumedia commented
      I might have to agree with you. I mean nothing beats face to face communication and having actual talks about serious coming out situations like this. Plus, in this generation, you should be open to your parents because they ARE your parents.

    • KistKiss
      KistKiss commented
      LoveLatteHappy it is not hard for you since you are a straight man, consider it for us trans people who find it hard to sort things out as to how we could come out to our parents.

  • #8
    Why not just leave it somewhere that they can easily see it. Like on a table or front of the fridge


    • JackWabbit
      JackWabbit commented
      You're right about that since that's the easiest way of telling them rather than giving it to them directly and waiting for them to finish reading the letter

  • #9
    That's what I've actually done when I decided to come out to my parents which was easier for me because I don't know how I'm going to tell it to them directly


    • #10
      for me isn't it better to tell them in person so that they can see and feel the sincerity
      in your words, writing can't carry the full emotions that you are having right now and
      if your really ready to come out you will have the courage to tell them face to face


      • BuffyThinFun
        BuffyThinFun commented
        I agree with this woman, if you are really ready to come out you would say it face to face
        especially if it's your parents they deserve to have the conversation about your coming out
        if you believe they truly love you then you'll be fine